#can you tell i forgot to take my adderall…

[sunlightfeeling]

ITS A COVER?!?!? …I MEAN “COVER”?! (since its technically still “his song” with SMAP -its a solo)

OMFG and here I kept thinking “damn…why didn’t they do a proper studio version of this, it feels like it could be so much heavier-sounding” idk why i thought this cuz the session is already super good

ANYWAY HE DELIVERS OMFG AHHHHHHHHHHHH

ALSO: HE MOANED at the end of the SMAP version!? Or someone, but like…it’s def him cuz who else would it be?? and it didnt sound like a generic sound effect that was just shoved in. but also this is just me getting my hopes because i really want it to be him…lmfao what a little shit but the timing was so brilliant 😭 like it can’t not be him because of the timing alone…it happens right when the music takes like a millisecond break, it’s fucking hilarious

I made the mistake of listening to this album while working. I was laughing so hard at Shingo’s and Nakai’s solos but then when I heard that, I knew I wasn’t getting any more work done 🥲

at least now i know to never listen to this album while driving, ridiculously dangerous…lol

They’re actually going to kill me one of these days. my chest still hurts…

[rottenpumpkin13]

Out Of Context Shit Heard On The SOLDIER Floor #7

Genesis: SEPHIROTH, STOP MEOWING AT ME.

Kunsel: Any loser twink can be a fem-boy, but it takes a real badass to be a fem-man.

Sephiroth: Did I "yee-haw" with joy, or did it convey depression?

Zack, holding up Cloud: BEHOLD.

Sephiroth, stealing a fry from Angeal's plate: A most generous offering. You will be spared. Angeal: FROM? Sephiroth: You will be spared.

Genesis, wearing sunglasses and holding a cappuccino: So there I was, gelato on my breasts—

Cloud: Aww, that's such a cute Halloween decoration. *pointing at Genesis sobbing in the corner*

Angeal: Who put a hotdog in the candy bowl?? Zack, in the background: Halloweenie.

Sephiroth: I could've sworn "motherfucker" was a compliment.

Angeal: IF YOU EAT THAT WEEK-OLD SUSHI PLATTER, YOUR INTESTINES WILL BECOME RADIOACTIVE.

Sephiroth: Zack, can I enjoy this steak dinner without you explaining A/B/O to me?

Lazard: I think we ALL need to beat our fathers with shovels, Sephiroth, you're not special.

Zack: NO! THAT'S MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT BANANA!

Genesis: He manspreads to assert dominance, I manspread to create a barrier between myself and heteronormativity. We are not the same.

Sephiroth: I just sent Angeal an email describing my feelings for him. If he doesn't reply, I'll show up at his apartment and superglue myself to the door.

Zack: Give me a pen, paper, and three Adderall, and I'll write something better than Loveless in one hour.

Kunsel: Everyone is subjected to failure, but at least I'm not Roche, who thought the plural of ninja was ninji.

Sephiroth: I have exactly three crayons on my person right now, and they're all stolen from Zack.

Angeal, chewing with his mouth full: Don't make psycho-sexual comments in front of my cheeseburger.

Zack, narrating what he's seeing: 🎶 Look at Angeal 🎶 beating Sephiroth with a frozen chicken because he forgot to take it out the freezer. 🎶

Sephiroth: Please refrain from analyzing my deep-seated fear of abandonment linked to my mother's absence and its impact on my emotional regulation, it's seven in the morning and I still haven't had coffee.

Cloud: I'm about two mental breakdowns away from resorting to gang affiliation.

Genesis: COUNTER SPELL! *flicks his wrist* TRAUMA!

Roche: I often have nightmares about Sephiroth attacking me with a spork.

Sephiroth, in the presence of a spider: I feel anti-at peace.

Zack: Dear diary, today I committed tax evasion, and felt great. Tomorrow I'll try embezzlement and eventually vandalism!

Sephiroth: Can you read this death threat note and check if my handwriting is recognizable?

Zack and Genesis: *Loudly arguing over who gets to be the ring bearer at Sephiroth and Angeal's wedding*

Angeal, laying on the floor: Good luck trying to find my will to live, gang.

Genesis: I'm flashing you a tit to maintain our friendship.

Sephiroth: If I had a gil for every time someone compared me to a cat, I'd have enough to purchase that expensive human cat bed that has been on my wishlist for ages.

Roche: Is my discount wig a joke to you, Zackary?

Cloud, placing an "I miss you" letter from his mother in Sephiroth's line of view: Yeah, that's right. Fuck you.

Lazard: Someone pinned a death threat on my office door written in glitter gel pen.

Genesis, flirting: I own an air-fryer.

Angeal: T-shirt that says "I survived Zack's power point presentation on aliens that included a photo of Sephiroth on the fourth slide"

Roche: Cloud Strife's evil twin…Grass Peace.

Sephiroth: *Showing Zack pictures of baby cows while Zack sobs into his burger*

Genesis: PUT. MASAMUNE. DOWN. No one is stealing your crayons.

Sephiroth: Genesis, I feel inspired to compliment your ass.

Lazard: Take a good, hard look at Sephiroth wearing flip-flops and tell me I shouldn't be stressed.

Sephiroth: A most efficient weapon to add to my arsenal *wielding an entire streetlamp*

Zack, talking to Angeal: My insecure trooper and faceless info guy, versus your 6'7 cat and walking red flag.

Kunsel: Is the cure to male loneliness *incomprehensible screeching* ?

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for being frustrated with my dad's procrastination and finally calling him out on it?

I (25 f) live with my dad (50ish? Too mad at him rn to check, m) because of mental illness rendering me unable to work due to lack of treatment, until now.

Recently, after I had to be taken to the emergency room for a ruptured ovarian cyst that I'd needed checked out for years prior to it popping, I decided on a whim to bring up my mental illness during the follow-up with my doctor, which put me on a very fast track to getting diagnosed with severe ADHD and prescribed medication (more specifically 5 mg of Adderall twice daily). And let me tell you, holy shit, it was like a miracle, I didn't even know medication could act that fast.

Well, long story short, it fixed my time blindness and made me consciously aware of my dad's long-standing bad habit of perpetually putting things off until "next weekend", affecting several major things both recently and not, including my ovarian cyst that I knew I had for years but couldn't go to the doctor for on my own because my car was perpetually in use by my sister or broken down, picking up my prescribed medication for said ovarian cyst because my car broke down ages ago and he never taught me to drive a stick, fixing my car or paying someone to do it for that matter (I can't afford it on my own), teaching me to drive in the first place when I came of driving age, my prior autism diagnosis (which itself took years to ever get done), several attempts at homeschooling that fell apart because we both forgot about it simultaneously, at least one broken bone that I can remember, and yes, the ADHD that I could only get diagnosed because I piggy backed off of an actual medical emergency.

Needless to say, I am not happy about that, so with my new executive function in hand, I confronted him. I basically laid out that I didn't think it was normal to procrastinate that badly for years and that he should consider getting evaluated for ADHD too because it's hereditary and I had to get it from somewhere, and added that if they put him on Adderall too it might help him write his book.

However, my dad accused me of talking like an addict (it's only day 2) and threatened to call the doctor and make him change the dose or take me off Adderall (my dad can't do that and I'm contractually obligated to stop him if he tries). When I pointed out that the dose I was given isn't even remotely enough to cause an addiction this early and that it felt like he was upset with me for being able to confront him now, he told me to back off and that I was acting like a jerk, and he demanded I talk with my doctor about alternatives (my doctor very specifically had me start on Adderall because he didn't think anything else would be effective--and given my understanding is that the alternatives would make every other brain function as bad as my memory and executive function so they're not as bad in comparison and not even fix the lethargy and excessive sleeping, uh, I think I agree). Note, he doesn't usually act like this at all.

I know that Adderall's side effects include irritability and I've always been bad at self-evaluation when I'm mad, so I've decided to take to the Internet to ask--aita?

What are these acronyms?

[clunelover]

Jeremy is out of town for a conference until Friday. This is mostly nice because I love alone time, but I forgot how icky quiet it can be in evenings when the house is empty (I just got back from picking up the dog, and my adorable brilliant resourceful children have gone out for a walk on their own).

I took one of his adderall again today, man the jury is really out on them…they make me quite relaxed, which as far as I know is kind of indicative of having actual ADD, that a stimulant will calm rather than energize…but it’s almost like they make me TOO calm! It’s like, the effect of only having one thought at a time is so powerfully calming that I just want to chill and enjoy the feeling of a calm mind, not waste it on WORK! We’ve all seen those viral tweets from the adhd people about how there’s no such thing as "lazy," it’s just a label that gets slapped on people who aren’t able to focus on tasks and finish them, etc! And I totally get the point of those posts and think overall it’s a good reframe, but I can also say as someone who’s experienced a lot of different mental states, both organically and as a result of substances: I AM lazy. Or I guess we could say that I just have almost no interest in my so called career - maybe if I did I’d feel like pointing my focus at it? But in the time I actually made myself sit down and work, I know I was able to read through several very long queries written by someone else no longer on my team, and figure out how they work enough to make some recommendations about how easy or difficult it would be to update them, and that would have been very very hard without the improved focus, so that’s cool I guess…but they are definitely not the magic "get all my work done, painlessly" solution I was hoping for!! And the crash as they wear off is very intense and bad. So I guess maybe I shouldn’t get into the habit of using them semi-regularly (you know, this plus the fact that they’re not prescribed to me…)

I told my therapist I was doing this, and how I doubted my psychiatrist is the sort who would hear I’ve been taking meds not prescribed to me and they kind of help, and decide that means I should get to take them for real, and so I wasn’t planning on telling…she said she wasn’t going to tell me I MUST confess this to my psychiatrist, and that she doesn’t think they will automatically cause a bipolar person to go manic, but she brought up the very good point that I’d hate to be in a situation where I was secretly taking them, then if I did have a manic episode, I would have to say "oh by the way I’ve been taking my husband’s adderall"- that would FOR SURE be a black mark against me as a patient and probably lead to me never getting a legit Rx. So, okay fine, between all these factors I guess I will abandon my "take the ones he doesn’t use on the weekends and be a good worker for two days a week" plan.

[lostryu]

If it s a minor med, how do you know they won’t call the cops? I don’t really trust services like that.

i literally accidentally took my gfs adderall, a highly controlled substance. they didn’t question shit about if it was intentional or not, they just asked me my age, weight, possible health conditions, time of ingestion, zip code, number, and name.

the first four is so they can calculate a toxic dose, or if you’ll have an adverse reaction in general. the fifth is to locate a hospital to call (if you need it) so in the event whatever you ingested knocks you out, or if you are unable to drive/have someone drive you, you can still get medical care.

i was asked my first/last name, but they honestly didn’t ask for anything else, and i could’ve given a fake one if i wanted. they don’t check. your number is so they can keep checking in on you as needed. in my case it was 2 times throughout the stages of uptake of adderall into my brain to make sure that i didn’t go manic or get seratonin syndrome at the peak of effectiveness. each call was like 2-3 minutes and they were very sweet.

i understand not trusting a lot of medical places (i’ve been there) but i do believe that poison control cares more about you not dying than like. ingesting a bizarre amount of tylenol cause you forgot when you took the last dose.

at no point was i judged for my blunder, and at no point was i demeaned for mixing up meds like that. maybe i was lucky to have an exceptionally nice person that day, but i do think that poison control is a good thing and that in the event you do something like i did (god forbid) you call and be safe.

once again, when applicable, always tell your healthcare provider what drugs you’re on and what you take for funsies. they’re not there to rat you out to the cops, they just wanna make sure they don’t fucking kill you with whatever they’re prescribing/doing with anasthesia.

[purplethespian]

How long of taking a medication should you go before telling your doctor you think you’re having side effects. Because on Wednesday I started taking adderall in addition to vyvanse (as prescribed by my psychiatrist) to help me with difficulties getting started in the morning. However, I feel like my anxiety has been worse since I started taking it, and I didn’t do anything all weekend because my anxiety was so bad. Like literally was frozen in my bed for almost two hours on Saturday because I somehow forgot to wash my hands after using the bathroom and thought I’d contaminated everything with E. coli. However however, I’ve had A Lot of things to be anxious about (such as more upcoming deadlines, fallout from the war that’s happening, etc) lately. So I’m not sure if it’s worth being like “Hey Doc I think the adderall is making my anxiety worse” if it could just be situational. And idk how long to wait until I can be sure it’s one or the other. Anyone have thoughts?

[snake-and-mouse]

Real talk the best thing I've found to help me do things like take meds on time is something my therapist called "routine stacking"

Whenever you have a task you need to do at a certain time, pair it with something else that's A a routine you've already managed to learn (or not even a routine no worries if you honestly don't have any, but just SOMETHING you reliably will be doing when you need to take your meds) or B make a routine incorporate something positive that will motivate you and make your brain see the routine as something good.

Examples, I've managed overtime to build a set "just woke up now what" routine that helps me push thru the initial executive dysfunction hill when getting out of bed, which has been a problem my whole life. It's just a set of basic morning tasks like brush my teeth or let out my dog.

I learned if I make sure these are always done the same way in the same order, over time while it doesn't become "automatic" the way routines do for neurotypicals, it's more like going down a street and having road signs making sure I drive the correct way even if I can't remember or need the pressure of actually having the sign tell me to turn left to be able to actually Do It.

Before, pretty much every task I needed to do in the morning and starting the day would take So Much Effort. But now, hey you go pee just about every time you wake up, right? Well now you're at the sink washing your hands. So wash your face too. And now teeth. And now let out the dog (because she knows the routine too and tell you it's time) and now feed her, well you were in the kitchen, so make yourself breakfast too. Well hey! You just did a whole morning (or whenever you woke up) routine wtf!

It's still diffucult on bad brain days, but there's always a safety net now at least to fall on, so on hard days I at least don't have to think or decide anything, the list of tasks is right there.

Now for the med part, instead of making taking my meds its own habit, I added it to another part of the routine. Half my meds are in the bathroom, the other half are where I eat. You brushing your teeth? Well make sure the water cup is filled enough to rinse your mouth AND swallow your pills cuz you're doing that right after. And for meds that need food? I keep granola bars or snack mixes right there next to the towels. And meal times? Well your pill box is right on the table, better grab what meds you need and set them right next to your plate

(also tip, if you take A LOT of meds that vary day to day and what time it is, I keep a shot glass on the table too specifically so I can browse over my pill box and take whatever I need that meal and put it in the glass, then it's easier to just take them one by one as I eat)

I also make sure I have lots of on hand foods in my room as well, the stacking works the best when you make it as easy as possible to do something, so hey, you're in your room doing xyz, next part of the routine is take your meds, but wait you need food or a drink? Don't assume yeah I'll just go do that. Executive dysfunction can make getting up and going to the kitchen take two hours. Or you go and get food but by the time you wander back, ya no you left the room where the thought "take pill" happened so that thought is gone. You also forgot you needed your phone charger RIP. So keep non-perishable snacks EVRYWHERE or get a mini fridge if you can afford it.

And snacks is a good option for B. Don't be afraid to treat yourself like a pet that doesn't want to take a pill. Taking your meds at the same time as eating some candy or doing something fun like a hobby or game, it makes a positive association in your brain that makes the routine stick easier as something you WANT to do, which means your brain will actually Remember to do it. So who cares if you shouldn't really need a bribe, you DESERVE a treat. Put some MnMs next to your Adderall. Charge your switch next to your pill box. Buy some fancy juice and drink that instead of always taking your pill with water. Make the routine something you GET to do instead of HAVE TO.

Anyway this has been Being Highly Therapised with Logan, hope someone actually benefit from it 😂

extremely fucked up that one of the symptoms of adhd is forgetfulness and difficulty sticking to habits and schedules and one of the best ways to alleviate those symptoms is by remembering to take a pill every morning at the same time

[daddyd0nt]

Realizing now that my weird attraction to gross characters is my inability to tell “well written/acted” characters/admiration for an artist or autistic interest in a pop culture figure like an artist or criminal to wanting to be important to them through marriage and therefor as I grew older sex which was the only way I was raised to believe a woman could be important. When I was very little I said I wanted to marry RL Stein, Rod Sterling, and Sergei Prokofiev (I absolutely said his name wrong but idr how I said it) without ever having seen a picture of 2/3 and thinking Rod Sterling looked kind of like a Disney Prince because of his haircut and liking his show like turns out I just like art and things that make me feel intensely especially things that make me feel afraid in a safe way because I have adhd to the point where I literally cannot function and am a disastrous dopamine seeker which I satiate with high octane media, marijuana, and carefully monitored but somewhat heavy adderall use but it keeps me from doing high risk behaviors and shit like self mutilating or b/p-ing out of under-stimulation or taking hard drugs (not that I don’t consider adderall hard I don’t think it or benzos should be given to anybody under 21) and allows me to beat my depression enough to do a few basic household tasks and even read a bit which like honestly is a miracle and I actually am enough of an adult now to be moderate about it and only use it a few days a week (at 19-23 I was taking every single one I was prescribed down to the day the way I was taking benzos up until recently and I was on 3x the dose back then) and like I’m confident that it’s not damaging anything because my dr orders a lot of testing and I also go to the hospital once or twice a year on average where I get a full heart thing (forgot what it’s called but the thing with the stickers) and blood work, never for more than like a week or two and sometimes I don’t go for years at a time but this is the worst year I’ve had since before the pandemic I went 3 times and also did a round in partial which I don’t really remember due to being snow on haldol but people not taking responsibility for their mental health is how most antisocial crimes (not drug/property crime but actual immoral shit like columbine or the ucsb shooting) happen and I’m honest with my therapist about what’s going on in my head even if it means I have to go under observation for a while until the episode passes and people feel safe with me being a member of the public again as minimally as I do/can participate like I’d rather deal with a week or two out of the year in the hospital than people in a dangerous state be not treated like a medical emergency that requires observation and rest at the very least and possibly medication which needs to be monitored closely especially in cases where high doses are used so that mentally ill people don’t wind up sentenced to a life of slave labor in the prison system or dead or hurting somebody else if you want people who are mentally ill to the point that they can’t participate in normal society or in a condition where they feel that they are not in control of themselves and at risk for making a bad potentially permanent choice to feel safe calling attention to and addressing their medical emergency and that means not only not throwing them into poverty/prison and giving them access to therapy and medication but funding hospitals and making them as pleasant and dignified as humanly possible so that you don’t feel like you are being punished for being sick if you are sick enough to have to spend time there this is a novel of a rant and I don’t think anybody will read it but I kind of just wanted to say it

[magnus-sm-writes]

July 10k Update: the Sequel

It’s my second 10k update for June! This Pride Month, I am succeeding. I’m only succeeding because I’m pushing myself to succeed. (Makes me feel like I’m in grade school again, setting myself up for success like this so I can get the rush from it.)

So as of 6/13, I am at 21,760 words this month. Yeah buddy!

Most of those words came from (Demon) Hunting for Love. I wrote a very short personal essay about the “it” part of my pronouns that I might try to publish later on. It’s pretty rough right now. A little too much so, I think. 

I have a habit of skipping around when I write. You could call it a “pretty big problem” if you were feeling particularly blunt, but personally, I like to count it as a strength. A semi-strength. When I’m inspired to write a scene, I slam that guy out, because there’s no point in putting that shit off until you’re no longer interested in it.

There are four different documents for this novel at the moment, which can make word count a little tedious to add up, but it’s super worth it, I promise. The largest portion (10,000 words alone) is basically the first act of the story. We establish Quincy as a huge weirdo who wants to gain the favor of a fellow demon, and Otto as a well-meaning but terrified demon hunter. This covers Otto nearly catching the demon Shax on camera, the beginning of the DemonSpotting controversy (Otto and his partner Trixie broke up a while ago but have been keeping up the charade), and Otto and Quincy’s first meeting, as well as just some Quincy history.

The next chronological document is their first ghost hunt. Yay! It takes place in a dilapidated barn much like the ones that litter the farmland in my hometown, so there’s a lot of love put into the setting.

Next is the scene where Otto calls Quincy his best friend, and the aftermath of that. Quincy is totally unsure of how to handle the fact that he’s let someone so close to him. Emotional issues ahoy.

Then I wrote a tiny kiss scene. I’m talking maybe 200 words. Because I wanted to figure out what their first kiss would be like, and I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be this way.

I made an obligatory (to me) Unnus Annus reference. Remember the escape room video? Ethan apologizing for being scatterbrained because he has ADHD and forgot to take his meds is such a mood. It’s such a serious, silly problem that I share.

“If you can’t tell I have ADHD, I don’t know how observant you are.” Otto glances over at him, then back to the road. “The paranormal’s a fixation of mine. When I don’t have my meds—oh God, I’m a nightmare to be around.” Otto shakes his head at himself. “One time, right, during that Adderall shortage, Trixie and I tried to do an escape room, and I just could not focus on any of the clues.” “Aw, c’mon. None of them?” “None.” Otto deletes a notification about a speed trap. “I think we ended up worse than when we started. Not kidding. I also think the employees thought that Trixie was, like, doing this out of pity, and it was… so embarrassing, dude, holy shit.”

There’s a lot of pretty good banter between the two. Maybe because I’ve been watching a lot of CreepCast and so the teasing banter is just coming easy as an extension of that. Or because I just really love when friends have a lot of good, witty conversations. Otto and Quincy’s chemistry comes across really well on the page.

And in typical Magnus fashion, I had to mention OSHA. My special interests are very dear to me. (That’s sorta the point, I know.)

“People died in that building.” “And we could be added to the list. Look at it, my guy. Like, really look at it.” Quincy gestures to the building with a grandness he feels it doesn’t deserve, pitiful as it looks.  “It looks…” Otto turns the camera to the barn. “Foreboding.” “Foreb—Otto, it looks like an OSHA violation to take me in there!”

This is exactly the sort of conversation I would have with someone. I’m known for casually pointing things out and naming them as OSHA violations. And Quincy only does it to annoy Otto on camera, because he’s a demon and he doesn’t care about OSHA standards as much as he does saying something smart-assy about the weird places Otto drags him.

Also, yes, as Quincy's employee, it is pretty sketchy, OSHA-wise, to make Quincy go into an unsafe building for work purposes. Not that Quincy gives much of a shit.

So, yeah, I’m pretty excited about this novel! It’s a blast to write something so… hmm. I wouldn’t call it “silly”, but perhaps “non-serious”. (Demon) Hunting for Love is just fun!

Ask to be added to the tag list!

[lastoneout]

Also adderall and other stimulant ADHD medications actually reduce the risk of someone with ADHD experiencing untimely death or accidental injury. Actual addiction, on the other hand, typically puts people at MORE risk of those adverse outcomes.

Plus people with unmedicated or under-medicated ADHD are at much higher risk of actually becoming addicted to something dangerous, often in an attempt to self medicate or cope with their symptoms and the negative situations having unmedicated ADHD can get you into(I cannot even tell you how many times I forgot to send my rent check to the landlord, ADHD can legit jeopardize your housing). When I'm not medicated I drink truly insane amounts of coffee to try to cope, which isn't good for my body, and I have legit almost died or burned my house down multiple times because my ADHD just didn't let me pay enough attention to what I'm doing to keep me safe.

Additionally, while stimulants are typically considered a BIG no-no during pregnancy, if the pregnant person has ADHD bad enough that it puts their life at risk, which it often does, they are allowed to continue taking it, because you can't exactly have a healthy pregnancy when you're almost burning your house down because you forgot to turn the stove off or getting into a car accident because you can't pay attention to the road or forgetting to fucking eat or shower or sleep.

Stimulant medications aren't for everyone but the facts show that people with ADHD are at basically no risk of becoming addicted to them(our brains basically can't, we don't get high from our meds) and not having access to appropriate medication can and will get us fucking killed or ruin our lives, and it's WILD to me that people can look at all that and still act like we're addicted to our meds and need to jump through 50 loops to be allowed to keep taking them.

My ADHD medication keeps me safe, functional, and alive, and needing something to keep me alive isn't the same as being addicted to it.

How was my doctor like "okay we'll try ADHD medication but we gotta be careful cause it's addictive" when I'm going through my day like "shit I forgot my meds. Shit I forgot my meds. Shit I forgot my meds. Shit I f

[johnemulaney]

John Mulaney: From Scratch in Las Vegas, September 4

Once again, spoilers for the show and what will presumably be in the special. This is about his relapse so tread with caution is that will be an issue for you. However, the tone of his struggle is the same one he used in his past specials so if you didn’t have any issues then, I think you’d be ok with this. Of course, use your own best judgement, friends.

The opener was Seaton Smith. 

He opened with trying to find the rich people in the crowd but acknowledged that they’d go mwrmwmwrw money isn’t everything so then he started talking about golf and went aha I got ya’ll. 

There was a joke about weed being the only Christian drug

He had a bit about when white people are nice, be nervous

He had a bit about there being a black man on the Bachelor and was like America (ABC and Disney+) were not ready for a black man to be fucking a house full of 50 white women. That shit premiered on Tuesday and the Capitol burned on Wednesday.

He also did some crowd work and roasted a couple in the front row for having different answers about kids and she was like I didn’t hear the question and was roasted about how not hearing questions you don’t want to answer is certainly a tactic, often used by drug dealers

He also had a bit about how different child rearing is in Texas versus New York and about how hitting your kids is treated differently, like his dad would have just threatened it whimsically. 

Now on to the Main Event!

The first thing he said was “hiiiiiiiiii” exactly in the tone you think he said it in. he followed that up with a little shrug looking adorable and a little bashful

“It’s him! Mr. Problems. Oh Las Vegas, Oh my god” he then talks about how Vegas is a land of vice and a Choice for him to preform in as a recovering addict. He had a sober buddy and 3 bodyguards with him at all times. 

“And here’s what happened” December 18, 2020, he gets invited to a friends apartment for dinner AND HE’S TWO HOURS LATE because he stopped, coked out of his mind, at SNL for a haircut because he still had his building access badge and he went to the hair department and they were like, he’ll leave faster if we just do this, and then he stopped at his drug dealers. 

He called venmo and cashapp, apps for drug deals and was like what do normal people even use them for. He maxed both out paying for drugs. 

He was the best looking person at his intervention. “Coke skinny, new cut” and the 12 people intervening looked like shit. He looked “tears for fears while they all looked jerry garcia” (I hope you know who those musicians are besties). 

He immediately yelled “Can I go to the bathroom” to you know, dump his drugs because when you walk into that, you know what it is. 

He was not allowed to go (he would be asked if he still needed to pee later and would say “what?”

There were 6 people in NYC and 6 people over zoom in LA because he guesses 6 people couldn’t be bothered to fly in for HIS INTERVENTION

Interventions can go two ways, it can be kind of accusatory and this is how you let us all down, or it can be supportive. Everyone but Nick Kroll got the memo to be supportive.

Nick Kroll went first.

Nick Kroll listed all the ways John was a bad best friend and brother over zoom and John was getting texts during the intervention saying Nick wasn’t supposed to do that and they were all sorry. 

Bill Hader went next. he originally wasn’t going to be able to make it so he had recorded a thing but since he was there, he did it live. (He would eventually send the video to John in rehab, which is not what you want on the way to rehab “awesome, more intervention”)

He tried to derail the intervention, “there’s not enough latinx representation” he said he’d go to any rehab except the one they had picked out for him. This was a star-studded affair and he was mad no one was being funny. 

 Natasha Lyons went next, telling him his life and career is in shambles

So he gets carted off to rehab after this intervention. Don’t let 12 comedians pack your bags for 2 months at rehab. it was bombas socks and iphone chargers. 

A little secret about rehab, you’re not allowed to bring drugs in. You remember how he was late? In his pocket on the way to rehab included: a huge amount of pills, 3g of coke (which was 2g by the time he got there, courtesy of a koala station in a gas station bathroom), and $2000 in cash. He had other plans for the weekend. He was admitted for xanax, coke, perocet, and adderall addiction. Say what you will, but he does not do anything half way.

It’s 4am when he’s sent to detox, he’s been awake for 3 days. 

He also gives a small lesson on how to get drugs. Find the lowest rated doctors on yelp and webmd reviews and go ask for them, they need all the business they can get. You become like Captain Phillips, I am the doctor now. 

Dr. Michael was his shady doctor. He was a first avenue apartment where he would write prescriptions from his kitchenette where his girl Minerva was always asleep. “I didn’t kill my wife Minerva.” But John would ask for his drugs, Dr. Michael would write the script and then ask what he needed it for. Dr. Michael would also make John take his shirt off, always offering a flu shot and going no, shirt all the way off (in case you were wondering how bad this addiction actually was)

The first moral is now you know. The second moral is get vaccinated.

He’s sent to the regular ward the next afternoon and they finally get him to sleep. 

He’s sketched out that doctors have last names at this establishment

He asks for drugs such as klonopin and is taken aback a bit when he doesn’t get them. The doctor is like PA state law says no, and so John suggests they go to a CVS in Jersey to get some. 

His bestie Pete Davidson starts calling that night. Except Pete changes his number every month and a half so John has him send a selfie and saves the new number under some other random name, at this point in time, Pete is saved as Al Pacino. (We get an Al Pacino impression) John is asleep and his nurse sees Al Pacino trying to call him 5 times and so she wakes him up. 

Pete Davidson and John Mulaney did not do drugs together. (The author is lowkey surprised and sad about that, like if Pete was my bestie, we’d make so many poor choices) But Pete was always very supportive of his sobriety. 

John needs recognition so badly, in group when they introduced themselves he said “I’m John M.” and no one cared. So he left a tabloid out with the news of his admittance and his face on it in the rec room on the table. The not being someone was “driving him bananas.” When they talked about what they do for a living and he said I’m a a stand up comedian, someone asked if he made a living that way. He said “yeah ask your daughter” (or your son)

One of the things you do at rehab is break up with your drug dealer.

One of his drug dealers only bought drugs to keep John from buying worse off the streets and only got into the game because John kept asking him for drugs and was his only buyer. That guy was originally a painter and John has no idea how they met. John is the only person to turn an innocent man into a drug dealer. 

Here he did the Baby J is back baby joke. the Park Theater is one of the biggest stages in the world so he did that joke in one pace across the stage and said the stage is that joke long. 

“I am no longer on drugs. It’s very good but also ah---” He’s in a 12 step anonymous group. 

“I need attention, clearly.” After a show you think he would be sated, but no. 

He wants that attention that the kid who’s grandparent died and showed up to school dressed for the funeral and got to sit in the beanbag chair for reading despite it not being his turn, gets. He went on about being willing to let one of the lesser important grandparents die so he could get attention, for quite a while. 

He feels left behind in science, like his C’s and D’s in those classes. All those classes were was putting things on a windowsill for the janitor to throw away. He had a bit about how the fuck people put dinosaurs back together, it’s like getting wayfair furniture without the instructions. 

He also things the moon belongs to America. Like we got there first and when other countries say stuff about the moon he’s like mmmmmmm.

He also had a joke about paying to get into college and like, for white people that’s always how it’s been. 

The show ended with him going over the highlights of that GQ interview that he was so coked out for that he forgot he did it entirely. He has no memory of it at all. He was just called up that day and asked for an interview and you know how coke is the best drug to receive attention on? He just did whatever he wanted with that attention. 

And that was the show.

[pumpumdemsugah]

What is your job title? I’m really interested in your shift into tech✨🤧

I don't really consider it tech but I am around alot of numbers, data and coding so I guess lol. It's more a data role than anything with finance and coding. Idk about saying my job title ( it's a pretty broad term and I might change my mind in the future) but I'm more than happy to tell you if you directly message me and answer any questions. I'm happy if any of my advice can help other women skip some of the nonsense I went through

I wanted to become a data scientist or UX designer but my brain was not having it lol and I just didn't have the skillset years ago to make the jump in a year so I had to figure out what my bridge job to that path would be. My previous job put me on a course for data science. I completed the dell data science associate and analytics, which helped and the benefit of doing courses is it will expose you to even more jobs involved in that sector. When I applied for my previous job, the job title was, data administrator but the title changed.

It got long sorry lol

When I was trying to go from customer service roles to office roles years ago, I looked up assistant positions for jobs I wanted and wrote out a list of the software, skills, achievement and main duties from the job specifications I kept seeing. This gave me a rough idea for a time line for how it will take to gain certain skills and what I'd be willing to do ( willingness is key )

Then I tried to figure out how to force my customer service job to give me opportunities to do lesser versions of these tasks, which was easy because I'm assertive and I'd just flat out ask lol. All customer service jobs usually involve admin tasks the key is figuring out what data or tech skill is similar enough that you can call those admin tasks " database maintenance"

YOUTUBE is actually really helpful for understanding what a specific skill looks like in action. It's one thing to read a duty for a job being, creating a database but you might not realise a spreadsheet is a database and that's how lots of people end up under-selling themselves. That way you can describe your skillset in a more accurate and flattering way

Going on indeed and searching for assistant versions of certain jobs and going on sites like https://www.prospects.ac.uk/ and looking up related jobs or career progression for roles can help you better apply for or find role titles, related to what you're trying to do because you might have enough skills to get entry level roles in close proximity to more data and tech jobs

Tbh data is much easier to get into but I'm in a data role so I'm biased lol

I've also tagged this and some of my other posts about this and jobs as "job blah". Hopefully something is useful and I really don't mind answering any direct messages. My job doesn't ramp up for a few weeks so I'm bored lol

However easy these YouTube videos make it sound that you can become a data analysis in a few months, ( it is possible with a good plan and Adderall) it's normal that it takes longer lol. My ADHD means everything I do takes longer.

Also I forgot about looking into credible certificates or professional certification you can pay for ( ranging anywhere from £300 to £2000 ) that you might need for certain jobs. Just make sure it's a credible provider ( LinkedIn certificates, udemy and most things on coursea don't count though it can help you learn more but jobs don't care about LinkedIn certificates)

[uinuvien]

Now that I have learned I have ADHD and gotten it diagnosed (thanks to Teen Wolf fics, btw) it has kinda started to bother me when people write Stiles as having ADHD and taking Adderall AND drink coffee AND be just fine.

Yeah, I take Conserta, not Adderall, but as far as I can tell, the same thing happens with both if drinking coffee and you know what that is?

Anxiety.

"I have accidentally driven myself to meltdowns with a nice cup of latte" levels of anxiety.

Drinking coffee while medicated for ADHD can also make you jittery, and some people actually get this right (accidentally or not), but I have also seen Stiles written to have that reaction to Adderall alone, which would indicate that he doesn't actually have ADHD (I saw a theory sometime ago that he actually has childhood PTSD misdiagnosed as ADHD and I think that was a very good point)

Also, while not everyone with ADHD react to caffeine the same way, it's really common that caffeine and other stimulants can make us tired and sleepy and it can also be used as a "stabilizer". I have accidentally and intentionally made myself fall asleep with energy drinks more than once when I misjudged the amount, but I have also managed to stabilize myself when I was ricocheting between fatigue and vibrating out of my skin in 5 minute intervals and calm down anxiety. I got addicted to tea when I was 10 and later in cola which in a hindsight were my unconscious attempts at self-medicating. They didn't and still don't make myself not-tired but they make it bit easier to focus when not medicated.

This very poorly structured post was brought to you by me forgotting to take my meds this morning and trying to patch things up with caffeine (because taking my meds after certain points means I won't sleep that night) and kinda failing and also making a mistake couple days ago and forgotting to order decaf latte and needing to listen EDM music on high volume to counter the resulted anxiety that almost made me throw up ✌️

[patheticperipatetic]

(if youd rather I make my ownpost lemme know and ill delete)

one and a half years after I started I accidentally let my offbrand adderall run dry. Even my reserve from extras from when I forgot the midday pill ran out. After a week it was super eerie. If the words exist I do not know them, to explain that it felt like I was living in a memory live.

All my memories have this sort of grain to them, not like an old photo but an aura of grain. I assumed this is what happens to memories since 100% of them had it, except for recent ones. So clearly as memories age they get grainy. Makes sense, no?

It was the adhd. The adhd is grain. The thoughts are grainy, the sounds are grainy the air is grainy the food is grainy. Old fashioned big booty tv static grain if you touched it after it turned off, but on everything everywhere. Link for young people to have context or old people who want nostalgia.

i hated it. i hated every single moment of reliving the static adhd grain. I got nothing done. I started a million things and finished 34 of them. People were telling me instructions and I was forgetting random steps despite putting all my focus on it. Theres very few times in life where you can find out what life would be like in an A/B situation and going off off-brand ritalin for a week and a half showed me I wasn't faking it even to myself. I bounced my leg relentlessly, and I cannot emphasize how much it felt like I was taking a tour of the past, but in modern days.

how to explain, I'm so frustrated I cant explain. Steampunk? Past tech but in modern times??

the grain the staic the adhd was physically there for me. i could see it I could fricking hear it it was there it was all around just as it was in all my memories. My memories didnt become grainy, my memories happened in the grain itself it was a filter over all of my senses and experiences for 30 years and then it was gone and I hadn't noticed it was gone until it came back.

day 1 without adderall. goddamn I really lived like this for 23 years.

[twopoppies]

I really hope this doesn't come off as me trying to start a fight (I'm not, I swear!!) but i saw the ask about the old pictures with the condoms in Harry's pocket and then the ask about his change from skinnies to his current style and your response, and just wanted to add my 2 cents because this is something that has been kind of heavy on my mind for awhile. I think that there's this fine line (lol, not intentional but I am laughing about it) between being sexualized and being acknowledged as being an attractive (sexy) person that we in the fandom are all kind of continuously trying to walk and also trying to get a feel for where Harry stands on it. Harry's comment about it being "so weird" and "so uncomfortable" to be a sex symbol I think has sort of thrown us all into a tizzy and we've gotten to the point where we can't see the forest for the trees, so to speak. To me, what it comes down to, is sort of this - Harry is, of course, a sexual being (um hello, we all are, and also, have you ever met a 27 year old man?), and he is more comfortable now than he used to be with sharing that part of himself with his fans and the world ("Medicine" is typing... "it's all about having sex and feeling sad"). But I think that doesn't mean there isn't a line that we should be really mindful not crossing, between acknowledging Harry is a person who likes to have sex and is embracing that about himself, and sexualizing Harry. I think of it a lot in terms of how much different the discourse would be around this if Harry were a woman, and fans were talking about being able to see her nipples through her shirt, or the outline of her vagina through tight pants, or making tiktoks dedicated to her being visibly aroused on stage, or (and god help me, this hurts to even write) talking about how she has a "good p**sy eating nose." I think if that were the case, there would be absolutely no doubt that the discourse surrounding Harry is inappropriate. And there has been a lot of conversation around how the way a person chooses to dress and the physical parts of themself that a person chooses to share does not then entitle the world to get greedy and take more. So, to me, whether or not Harry said he was uncomfortable being sexualized or uncomfortable being a sex symbol or both or neither doesn't matter as much as the fact that the way a lot of his fans talk about him is often inappropriate and gross. Again this definitely, definitely, isn't aimed at you or intended to be an attack or start a fight, it's just something that has been weighing heavily on my mind lately, and I wanted an outlet for my thoughts (and then once I started typing I couldn't stop. Can you tell i forgot my adderall this morning?) Thanks for hosting such a safe space for all of us to share our thoughts.

Hi sweetheart. I actually really, really agree with you. What I was pointing out (or trying to point out) was that a lot of people use that quote of his to attack others for even noticing that Harry is attractive. There’s just a difference between being sexualized and being sexual. And there’s a difference between noticing (or even appreciating) someone’s sexuality and sexiness, and being vulgar and dehumanizing them in a sexual way.

Which I think is along the lines of what you’re getting at. I was just too lazy to type it all out. 😆😆😆 But I really appreciate your additional thoughts. And I definitely agree that if he presented as a woman, everything would be different. And that’s a huge conversation in and of itself.

In reference to this

[viaravt]

I posted 671 times in 2021

168 posts created (25%)

503 posts reblogged (75%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 3.0 posts.

I added 1,419 tags in 2021

#tma - 381 posts

#the magnus archives - 163 posts

#magnus archives - 154 posts

#magnuspod - 137 posts

#rusty quill tma - 128 posts

#tma podcast - 109 posts

#tma fandom - 102 posts

#the magnus pod - 100 posts

#random - 78 posts

#tmart - 67 posts

Longest Tag: 136 characters

#that crawls and chokes and blinds and falls and twists and leaves and hides and weaves and burns and hunts and rips and bleeds and dies!

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Got my bestie into TMA and she sent me this and said, "aw I found the perfect engagement ring for Jon and Martin" and all I could think to say is, "then Jonahlias can just watch like the weird voyeur he is"

106 notes • Posted 2021-07-13 03:07:48 GMT

#4

So @beansmakesart finished the most amazing and poignant TMA animation today and so I've been inspired to work on my silly one all today <3 This is the beginning and I think it's about 90% done. Enjoy! Always happy to hear any comments and constructive criticism! <3

120 notes • Posted 2021-08-02 03:18:07 GMT

#3

Today's date included this Spiral AF door:

It's like 3 ft off the the ground and there's not even an indication of stairs having ever been there. Michael/Helen, you're not fooling anyone with this. [ID: A door in a brick wall. The door is approximately 3 ft from the ground and there are no stairs. The picture was taken from a parked car. End ID]

122 notes • Posted 2021-07-30 03:06:48 GMT

#2

Went up on my Adderall dose today and I feel this emotion, Mr. Nugget. I had a partner tell me once that they can tell that I actually have ADHD because when I take my Adderall, all I want to do is nap. And I don't think that it's because I'm necessarily tired or anything - I think it just quiets things down?

When I'm unmedicated, my brain is just a constant litany of nonsense. It's like if you put a radio on 'seek' and you only hear like 3 seconds of each station, except instead of radio stations it's "Lists of Things I Need to do" or "The Greatest Hits of me Being Dumb" and I just get this constant stream of nonsense and it's hard to relax.

But when my brain is quieted by the chemicals in my medication, it's blissfully quiet. I can relax, even sleep! I can concentrate without that nonsense screaming for my attention.

I just wish someone had told me about this before I was 32

135 notes • Posted 2021-07-13 20:06:26 GMT

#1

I forgot to post this yesterday, but I got a TMA-inspired manicure :D

If you like it, reblog and put which is your favorite design in the tags <3

139 notes • Posted 2021-07-20 23:36:46 GMT

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